Oh well. The reason you came here is...let me guess...to find out who Chipmunk Santa is, right? Pure curiousity brought you here, right? Your curiousity is this big, in a purple sac and it's tangable! GEEZUMS!!! If your curiousity is PURPLE AND TANGABLE then I MUST tell you who Chipmunk Santa is!!!

Just by his name you can probably guess that he's some kind of various of Santa Claus. And if you were intelligent, you would look at the first word of Chipmunk Santa's name, you'd probably come to the conclusion that he is a chipmunk. He is the SANTA OF ALL CHIPMUNKS!!!!

Here's the story of Chipmunk Santa:

JUST KIDDING!!!! Chipmunk Santa was the youngest of twenty-five. He had seven mothers and by the time he was eight, he already had a wife and two children. From the day of his birth, he was a chain smoker, going at three packs a day.

Later in his life when he was about twenty (now had seventeen children and four grandchildren) he racked up to about five packs a day. He had at least five different disgusting smoking diseases and he looked very screwed up for a chipmunk. His excessive smoking seemed to make him grow so instead of being about five inches tall, he was about three feet.

So how did this freak of nature become the Santa of all Chipmunks? That's a very good question!! Well, I know why and I will tell you if you worship Chipmunk Santa right now and sacrifice your cigerettes to him.

Are you worshiping him and giving your cigerettes to him? Good! On with the story!!

One December night (it was the 24th), Chipmunk Santa was sitting by the window and watching the snow fall. He realized that he suddenly wanted to give presents to all the chipmunks of the world!!

JUST KIDDING AGAIN!!!!

Chipmunk Santa was playing poker with his grandchildren while shoveling many platefulls of beans in his mouth. Suddenly, one of his grandchildren started talking aboutt his far away land he had visited where this jolly old man with a white beard was living with thousands of little elves. They all made toys for children out of the goodness of their hearts.

"That's the most ridiculous thing I've ever heard!!" said Chipmunk Santa with a laugh. "Imagine, someone giving a complete strange a present for no particular reason whatsoever!"

Everyone shrugged and continued smoking and playing poker.

That night, Chipmunk Santa felt a strange tingle in his um...well...his heart. Yes, his heart. And he suddenly decided that he would give presents to all the chipmunks of the world. But they wouldn't get WONDERFUL presents, they'd be getting things that Chipmunk Santa no longer wanted!! HAW HAW HAW!!!

After many eons of giving retarded "presents" to the chipmunks, (yes, even though Chipmunk Santa is a cronic smoker since his birth, he lived for eons) he decided that he wanted a bunch of elves to help him collect presents. He also decided that instead of giving away his OWN stuff, he could just STEAL them from random chipmunks and then give them BACK to those random chipmunks and they would never know the difference!! YAY!!

That's mainly how Chipmunk Santa came to be. Sigh. But his rein of Santa-ing for all the chipmunks came to an end when he an evil menorah fought to the death, sadly Chipmunk Santa didn't make it.

So now it's over...

Ryoga: WAIT!!! THAT'S IT?! WITH CHIPMUNK SANTA DEAD, HOW WILL ALL THE CHIPMUNKS OF THE WORLD GET THEIR PRESENTS?! IT'S NOT FAIR!!!

Why would you care about the chipmunks of the world? So what if Chip and Dale don't get their presents?! Who cares if Simon and Theodore wake up and have NO presents in their stocking?! Who cares if Alvin doesn't get his hula hoop?!

Ryoga: NO HULA HOOP?! NO!!! I must REPLACE Chipmunk Santa and make sure that all the chipmunks get what they deserve!!! *runs out of the room while ranting about the innocent chipmunk orphans of the world and how sad they'll be when they wake up and find that they have no need to live without the presents that the former Chipmunk Santa used to deliver to them.*